Sherry

“SHERRY”

By: Grant King

November 2, 2015

The Dream Part 1.

I dreamed it was a Sunday morning at church. I was singing a solo that weekend and we had just finished the 9:30 service and the choir was making their way to the music room for some fellowship and refreshments. I was just checking out the snacks when I heard a man's voice, "Is Grant King here?" I looked up and saw one of the pastors with a rather petite blonde woman. She looked to be in her 40's but somehow I got the impression that she looked older than she was. I said, "Yes, I'm here. What's up?" I'd like to introduce you to Sherry." He said. "She wants to meet you." "Hi Sherry." I said. "My name is Grant." "I'm glad to meet you," she said. She seemed somewhat nervous. "I wanted to tell you how much I enjoyed your song this morning. It was really beautiful." "Thank you", I said, sensing her shyness. "And thank you for coming all the way to the choir room to tell me that. It really means a lot".

She looked down slightly and said. "That's not the only reason I came. May I ask you a question? It may seem strange." "Sure". I replied. "A few years ago, were you in the town of Stuart, and did you see a homeless woman in the parking lot at a shopping center? And did you bring her a roast beef sandwich and a lemon flavored ice tea?" Totally bewildered, I replied, "Yes, I did. But how did you kn...?" At that point I choked up, my eyes flooded with tears and I almost staggered backwards. She smiled through her tears and said, "I found you. You're the angel God sent to help me when I prayed to him."

The Parking Lot.

Several years previously, our son was asked to play the drums for a church up in Stuart. They had a Saturday night service at 6pm and 2 Sunday services. He needed to be there at 3pm so the band could practice. After dropping him off, I had about 2 hours of free time before church, so I decided to get some saw blades at Harbor Freight and find something to eat. As I pulled into the parking lot I saw a woman, several parking lanes over, holding a cardboard sign. She looked to be in a very bad way and I felt that I had to do something, even if just to give her some money. The traffic pattern was such that in order to turn around so I could get to where she was, I would literally have to go all the way to my destination. So I figured that I might as well just go in and get what I was after and then help that lady out. I got my stuff, paid for it, got in my car and headed out. I saw the lady was still there so I reached in my wallet to get some money out. As I did, I sensed a still, small voice very emphatically say, "Do not give her any money!" Now that seemed strange but I didn't dare disobey. In my mind I could hear the angel's words to Balaam, "I would have killed you and spared the donkey". I drove by her and I saw her up close. She looked sick, hungry, frail and frightened; like a scared rabbit. Her cardboard sign was so small I could barely read it: "Homeless". 

Straight ahead was a Publix grocery store so I decided to go see if anything looked good in the deli and thought that maybe I'd get some clarity. She obviously needed help and this simply did not make any sense.  

I made my way to the deli and began looking at the dinner items. Nothing really looked that good so I turned towards the sandwich counter. A roast beef sub actually sounded great.

What didn't sound great was that it only cost $1.50 more to buy the foot long sub than the half sub. My days of eating an entire roast beef sub on whole wheat  without serious repercussions were long since gone. So I only really wanted a half sandwich but it seemed like a lousy deal. Then the still small voice spoke to me, "Buy the whole sub and half will be for you, and the other half for that woman." Suddenly everything made perfect sense. I was to bring her something to eat. So I ordered a roast beef sub with mayo, lettuce and tomato, and black olives. (The voice even said she'll like it just the way I do. Very specific ). Then I grabbed a coke which I really didn't want. But I wasn't going to pay a dollar for a bottle of water. I got up to the check out and something caught my eye. At the front of the store they had a drink cooler with these Arnold Palmer ice teas in it, and they were only 99 cents. That really sounded good. Again, the still small voice spoke, "One for you and one for her". So I paid for the food and headed out to take this woman her dinner. As I got to where she was, another car was there and it appeared that the driver was talking to her through the passenger window so I pulled up to her left and rolled my window down. After the other car left, she furtively glanced my way and I asked her if she was hungry. Poor thing. She looked as if she was going to cry as she nodded. "I hope you like roast beef", I said. "I love roast beef", she replied in a voice barely above a whisper. "But I don't want to take your dinner." "No", I said, "I have my dinner. This is your dinner." "O, thank you. This is wonderful". She said. I reached into my bag and pulled out an ice tea. "I've never had one of these before but I've heard they're really good. I hope you like it", as I gave it to her. "O this is SO wonderful." She said.” Thank you." I don't think anything else was said before I drove away after giving her the meal.

It seemed like I had done pitifully little to help this poor woman. I felt as if I should have done more but I didn't know what. I didn’t know where to get permanent help for her. I also found myself second guessing myself. Should I have said anything like, "God bless you", or "Jesus loves you"? I even chided myself for not giving her the entire sandwich. But in all of this I sensed the quiet assurance that I had done exactly what I was supposed to do. I doubt she weighed 80lbs soaking wet with her pockets full of change. That half sandwich was going to last her through the next day and anything more would have spoiled. She didn't need to hear any nice sentiments. She simply needed someone to meet her immediate need which was good food and something to get her hydrated and electrolytes back up. Roast beef on whole wheat with some fresh lettuce and tomato was probably the healthiest thing she had eaten in a long time.

The Dream Part 2

Sherry spoke slowly in a soft voice that almost had a musical quality to it. She was very articulate in spite of her rather simple vocabulary. "I used to go to church sometimes when I was little. I heard about Jesus and that he loved me. But people did bad things to me and hurt me so bad, that I didn't believe he was real. And if he was real, he didn't care about me. I came to Florida and a lot of bad things happened to me. I lost everything and ended up on the street begging. That was when you saw me. I had prayed to God that if he was real and if he cared to please help me. That's when you came. When you asked me if I was hungry I wanted to cry but I couldn't. I was so hungry and so thirsty. When you gave me the food and the drink, I really thought you were an angel from heaven."  "It was so little." I choked out. "I should have done more." She put her hand on my arm, "Grant, when I feel asleep that night, I wasn't hungry. I was always hungry before. Sometimes I would find something to eat that was bad and then I'd feel sick. But that night I was full and I didn't feel sick." She smiled and continued. "I still had plenty to eat the next day. Do you know how I kept it from getting spoiled?" I shook my head. "I had a plastic bag and I went to MacDonald’s and at the drink machine I would get ice and put it in my bag. Then I put it around my sandwich and wrapped a shirt around it. It would stay cold all night and was still good in the morning. Then I got more ice. I still had some the next afternoon." I smiled. Ingenious. As tiny as she was, I could easily believe that it was enough food for 2 days. 

She continued, "But you gave me something more. Do you know what that was?" I shook my head. "Hope." She replied. "I had lost hope. I didn't believe that God cared about me and loved me. Each day meant the same thing. Hunger, begging, and wondering if someone was going to hurt me. I really believe if God hadn't sent you that I would have given up. But I cried out to God one more time and then you came. At first I was scared that you wanted to hurt me. You looked scary with sunglasses." She smiled, a little embarrassed, then continued. "Do you know what you said to me when you brought me food? I shook my head. "When I said to you that I didn't want to take your dinner, you said that it wasn't your dinner. It was MY dinner. That's when I knew God had sent you to help me. You didn't share your dinner or give me your dinner, you brought me MY dinner. It was just for me." She was right. The still small voice had said that one was for me and the other was for her. It was her dinner. I had never thought about that. "That's when I began to hope and believe again that Jesus loves me."

Then she said, "I have to go now. My ride is waiting and you need to go back into church because the next service will start soon." "Will we see you again?" I asked. I wanted to know so much more. "I'm going to go home now but we will see each other again someday in heaven. And I'm going to be there because you obeyed God." Sherry reached up to hug me. "Thank you so much." I said. "Thank you for finding me and sharing all of this. It means so much just knowing you're doing well today." "I'm getting there," she said, smiling. "And I’m not hungry anymore. Thank you for being obedient and doing what God told you to do." Then she turned, walked out the door and was gone.

Epilogue

I think I should clarify a few things. The dream chapters were a very vivid dream that impacted me on several levels for several days afterwards. The parking lot chapter actually did happen in real life. 

Dreams are strange things. I used to brush them off as silly and meaningless. I've stopped doing that. I've had too many times where a dream or the "still small voice" turned out to have serious implications so I don't ignore them anymore. I don't have any idea what triggered this dream. It was a single incident that happened several years earlier that I had mostly forgotten about. Maybe God had a reason for me having this dream. He certainly knew I was going to. While I don't believe that God is still revealing anything more in the way of scripture today, I certainly believe that he does speak to his people through different means. If I didn't believe that, then I'd have to conclude that when the last apostle died, God did too. I don't believe we worship a dead God.

I've shared my lunch or even given my entire lunch to a homeless person on a number of occasions. This time was different for a few reasons. On is that it seemed that God gave me specific instructions on how to help her. Also her expression of heartfelt gratitude was far beyond anything I'd seen from bringing a homeless person food. I really believe the only reason she didn't cry was because she didn't have the strength to. Of course what was challenging for me is that I never knew how it ended. I wanted to know if what I did really made any difference. God didn't tell me. I sensed my instructions were to buy a sandwich and an ice tea and then take it to her. I guess the secret things belong to him. The teacher in the Old Testament said that the whole duty of man is to fear God and obey him. Most of it is spelled out for us in his word. Beyond that he whispers to us through his spirit specific commands for specific things. Whenever I have sensed the "still, small voice" it wasn't often to tell me about some great plan he has for my life. It's usually something like, "You need to apologize to that person." or, "You weren't completely honest. You need to go back and make some clarifications". I remember my failures in vivid detail but I have a hard time thinking of times that I really got it right. Maybe that's why I search for significance. I want to make a mark and know I've made a real difference. The problem is, that makes it all about ME and MY impact. That shouldn't be the primary focus. Surrendered obedience should be. Ironically, a life characterized by surrendered obedience will make an impact. If our focus is to make an impact, we might succeed. But an impact made by someone whose life is not characterized by surrendered obedience is not a good thing; even if it does help some people. Maybe that's what the dream was all about. It was to remind me that God uses our obedience to make a difference and that it DOES make a difference. I don't really think God, in a mystical way, was actually telling me what happened after I left the parking lot. 

I am almost embarrassed by how little of .a sacrifice it was to help this woman. I was going to give her $5. Between $1.50 extra to get the whole sandwich and 99c for the drink, plus tax, it cost me little more than half of what I intended to give her. I can't say it was any sacrifice of time either. I was already there. She was in the parking lot and I didn't need to be anywhere. That's why it seemed like I did so little and I should have done more--much more. But perhaps to someone who hadn't eaten in a few days and was getting dehydrated it meant a lot. I still wonder if it really made an eternal difference or if it just prolonged the inevitable. That really isn't my concern though. I just did what I believe I was told to do. The results are up to God. I guess it's natural to want to know that I'm not just here taking up space and using up oxygen. Thee truth is, we can rest assured that if we are seeking to be obedient, then nothing is wasted. I heard it said that God is weaving together a beautiful tapestry with our lives. We see the back side of it. On our side it looks like a tangled mess of different colored thread. But on his side it's a beautiful work of art. Maybe that's what it means to trust him. Trust him that he has a beautiful purpose in everything when all I can see is a tangled mess. Who knows? Maybe all if this happened so I could write it down and someone else would read it and be impacted.

As far as the woman; I know nothing about her. Her name was Sherry in my dream, but in real life, I don't know. I had a number of occasions to be in Stuart over the next couple of months. When I was in that part of town, I would look around, but I never saw her again. Perhaps she was an angel herself, sent for the sole purpose of teaching me generous obedience. The apostle said it can happen. God alone knows. Maybe one day I will ask him,..or... maybe ask her. For now, it remains a mystery. All I can do is pray that God led her to a good place and today she is restored and thriving, or that he brought her safely home.