When I was a teenager I read a book, and I can't remember for sure what the title was but it was something like, "Davy Jones' Haunted Locker". Davy Jones' locker is the realm of the dead for those who die at sea. And Davy Jones rules this underworld.
Well there's a man in this village who has a crush on these three different women who are known for their beauty, and he's constantly trying to win the heart of one of them. Then there's this kind of cute, but somewhat annoying young lady who, in the modern vernacullar, thinks that he is the "cats' meow".
Somehow this man ends up dying at sea and finds himself in Davy Jones' locker and meets the rular of this realm, Davy Jones himself. Over a period of time in this realm it is discovered that a mistake has been made and they need to send this man back to the land of the living. So to compensate the man for the inconvenience, Davy Jones grants him three wishes. So the man asks for:
Fame:
Wealth and
Wisdom
Davy Jones begin to answer: "If you make it back safely, You will be famous". That took care of the first wish. For the second wish Davy Jones told him where there was a small chest of treasure buried; wish two.
For his third wish, Davy Jones said, "There are three rules of wisdom that you must follow if you want to be wise.
The first rule is don't marry the most beautiful woman in the village. because all she thinks about is herself and how beautiful she is.
The second rule is don't marry the second most beautiful woman in the village Because all she thinks about is how beautiful she is. But she's also miserable because she's not the most beautiful woman in the village"
The man asks, "Anything else?" Thinking at least there's still the third lady.
"Yes", Davy Jones said. "Don't marry the third most beautiful woman in the village. Because all she thinks about is how beautiful she is and she's even more miserable because she's not as beautiful as the other two women".
The man, now really confused asked him, "Well who should I marry then?"
Davy Jones replied, "Marry the woman who thinks that you are the most wonderful and handsomest man in the village. She won't be consumed by how beautiful she looks but she will look after your needs and desires which means that you will be able to look after hers too."
The man immediately thought of the cute, annoying girl and thought that maybe she wasn't that annoying after all.
The story of course ends with him marrying the "cute" lady and living happily ever after.
I've often thought about this story over the years and thought long and hard about how easy it can be to spend all of my energy pursuing something that I can never have. Or if I could have it, I would realize after it was too late, that it was not what I really wanted. Or that it was going to be a disaster. But is it possible that the very thing I am trying to win, is something I already have. Like the man in the story, trying to win the heart of a woman whose heart he'll never win, not realizing that he's already won the heart of the one who really does love him.
It isn't just about relationships. It can be about almost anything. I've even seen it with beekeeping. It's true. Someone gets the idea that it would be wonderful to have their own honey. They acquire, sometimes, several hives and then realize that they are absolutely terrified of bees or, worse yet, they are deathly allergic to bee stings.
So how do we know what the right choices for us are? I believe a lot of times we pursue the wrong things (I'm not talking about sinful) because we don't really know ourselves. So what is the solution? I think it's get good counsel. I don't mean necessarily a professional counselor although that may be what is needed, but surrounding yourself with wise friends who really know you. Maybe you're thinking of getting into beekeeping. A friend who knows you may remind you that you freak out when a bug flies by your face. Maybe it is a relationship. A friend might tell you that the other person doesn't like you and probably never will. besides that, they're into sports and you're into reading...,or whatever. As it says in Proverbs 5:22, "Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisors they succeed." We often really fool ourselves where others can see and provide needed direction. One of the great tragedies is that many people spend all of their energy striving to reach the top and when they get there, they realize it's a pile of manure. And then they can't get down. It's much easier to never get into a bad situation than to try to get out of one. Perhaps with wise counsel they would have seen that it wasn't going to be the best thing.
Of course, the most important thing is to pray. God is the best counselor. Ask him for direction and especially for the humility to listen. Often he provides his direction through other people. Often the counsel is not what we want to hear. because in our nature, we want what we want. That's why a humble spirit is so important. Proverbs 9:9, "Instruct a wise man and he will become wiser still."
But what if you've really messed up. As long as you're still alive, tomorrow is a brand new day. I've been thinking a lot abot the ending of the movie Castaway lately and I'll end with a quote from it. "...Keep breathing. Because tomorrow the sun will rise. Who knows what the tide could bring". Nobody knows what tomorrow will bring. It could be the beginning of something new and wonderful. But you have to keep breathing. Blessings to all.
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